


Scare Me Not

by f0rever15elf



Category: Bloodsucking Bastards (2015)
Genre: Blood Drinking, F/M, Food mention, Pedro Pascal - Freeform, Swearing, alcohol mention, blood mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:54:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27115709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/f0rever15elf/pseuds/f0rever15elf
Summary: It’s Halloween, and Max has decided to try to scare the local kids with his vampire face while you hand out candy. it…doesn’t go quite as planned.
Relationships: Max Phillips / you, Max Phillips/ reader
Comments: 4
Kudos: 9





	Scare Me Not

Max loves Halloween. It’s one of the things you two had in common from the very beginning, loving the spooky ambiance, the haunted houses, the horror movies, even the campy decorations. Every year, Max never hesitated to shell out the big bucks for new decorations, or to take you to the newest haunt of the season. He loved when you’d get so scared, you’d shriek and cower against him. He’d wrap you in his arms as he laughed and you would smack his chest and call him a prick and then you’d do it all over again the next weekend. It was your own little tradition, and you really wouldn’t have it any other way. He also loved those sexy little dresses you’d slip into for holiday parties. One year it was a sexy nurse, the buttons nearly bursting over your bust. The next was Harley Quinn. Hoooo man did those booty shorts make your ass look _amazing._

Now, while he enjoys the concept and general feel of the holiday, what he doesn’t enjoy are the kids. He finds their screaming and laughing annoying, and his vampire hearing means that he hears it from damn near across town. Before you moved in with him, he’d never have candy out for the kids, keeping his home well locked up and dark. A right grump when it came to the kids having fun. That all changed when you moved it, much to his chagrin. You _adored_ answering the door to give candy to the kiddos all dressed up for the night, feigning fear when they growl or scream or roar at you before dropping a king sized candy bar into their bags. The home you now shared with Max as his girlfriend went from silent as the grave on Halloween to _the_ spot to trick or treat.

And Max loathes it, only putting up with it to see the smile on your face. 

“ _Babe… what are you doing?” he had asked you incredulously as you put the box of king sized bars in the grocery cart. “You don’t eat that shit, even on my favorite time of the month.”_

“ _It’s for the kids, baby,” you grinned back at him, ignoring his comment as his eyes nearly bug out of his skull._

“ _No._ Hell _no. We are not accepting trick or treaters. Snot nosed little brats.” You pouted at him as he ranted, wrapping your arms around his as you flashed him your best doe eyes and did your best to press your boobs out towards him. Max was a simple man, at times. Boobs and flirty eyes almost always did him in._

“ _Pllleeeaaasseeee Max? Pretty please? I wanna see their costumes and give them some candy! It’s important!” He purposefully avoided your gaze, his hands stuffed in the pockets of his slacks. Your pout deepened before you stood up on tiptoe, whispering into his ear. “If you let me, I’ll let you feed on me after,” you all but purred and his body went rigid, hungry eyes turning to lock on yous._

“ _That so?” he had asked, eyebrow raised and you nodded, grinning. You hadn’t gotten to that point in your relationship yet, still a little wary of his fangs, so you knew it would seal the deal, and you were right. “Well… I guess we can allow the little menaces to come get some candy… But I’m not dealing with them.” You grinned, bouncing on your toes with excitement as you nodded, readily agreeing._

“ _Thank you thank you Max!”_

That had been three years ago, and the tradition remained. So long as Max could have his own treat after the kids stopped showing up, you were free to hand out the best candy on the block. This year, however, Max has an idea.

“Hey babe,” he calls from the bedroom and you make your way down the hall, poking your head in. You raise your eyebrow when you see his face contorted into his vampire visage, fangs out and eyes an unsettling cat’s eye yellow.

“You okay, Max? Do you need to eat?” You know sometimes he loses control of his face when he’s really hungry, but you were pretty sure he had eaten earlier, there were plenty of packets in the fridge.

“Yeah, I’m good. Got a question.” He looks back at the mirror he had been appraising himself in. “Think I could scare the neighborhood kids looking like this?”

You meander in, wrapping your arms around his waist as you rest your head on his shoulder, having to stand on tiptoes to do so. “Hmmm…” You reach a hand up to gently drag along the ridges of his prominent brow before dropping down to trace the fangs poking over his lip. “My terrifying vampire… I think you’d be able to scare the kids pretty easily.” He grins around his fangs, chest swelling with pride.

“I’m gonna,” he proclaims. “I’m gonna go hide in the bushes you had installed in front of the house, and jump out to scare them as they come up for candy.” You can’t help the giggle that escapes your lips as his words come quickly, swimming in excitement. He turns in your arms, resting his hands on your hips as he grins around his fangs at you, face still morphed. The first time he showed it to you, a primal fear shot through you, every survival instinct telling you to run the other way. But then the logical side won out over the frightened animal, and slowly you had become desensitized to it, much to Max’s relief.

“Well, Scaremeister, you best go get hidden then.” He nods, moving past you to the hall when you call his name again. He pokes his head back into the bedroom, curious. “Any kid who comes up with a parent is off limits for scaring, ok?” He pouts as much as his morphed face would allow him to, then he sighs.

“You gotta take the fun out of it?”

“Max Phillips,” you caution and he raises his hand and sighs dramatically.

“Fiiiiinnnneeeee. No scaring the babies.” You nod, smiling as you walk past him, smacking his ass on the way to the kitchen.

“Happy scaring, babe.” He grins and in a blink, he’s gone, door closing behind him. You shake your head with a smile, grabbing the candy bowl to go set up outside. Maybe this year at least he’d be less mopey.

~~~~

Well, you were wrong.

Max leaps from the bushes again for what seems like the hundredth time, roaring in that weird two-tone voice he has when he’s fully transformed as two boys make their way up to the patio. They blink at him and laugh, shaking their heads. “Man, that’s some crappy sfx makeup man. You should like, go take classes or something.” They continue to laugh as they make their way up to you and you give them a half hearted smile as you put their candy in their bags, thankful it was the last you had. They turn to leave, Max standing in the bushes with leaves in his hair, looking like a kicked puppy. A very… scary… and misshapen puppy. Hardly anyone had been scared by him tonight, and a decent handful of the kids had _laughed_ at him. You know his ego is bruised, and when you call out to him gently, reaching for his arm, he shifts away from you.

“This was a terrible idea. Screw this,” he mutters, darting back inside before you could so much as blink. You sigh, following him in at a much more human pace, killing the porch light and locking up behind you.

“Max? Baby?” The house is quiet, but you can feel the anger and irritation radiating from upstairs. You sigh, knowing full well he can hear you, and make your way to the kitchen. A good bloody Mary, in the most literal sense of the word, always worked to turn his mood around. You hum softly as you pull out one of his blood packets, tossing it on the counter as you rummage for the tomato juice and the good vodka you kept hidden at the back of the fridge. When you open the pouch, you feel the wind of him entering the room rather than hear him, and a smile pulls at your lips. You ignore his presence, pouring the contents of the pouch into his mug before adding a few splashes of vodka.

“Smells sweeter than normal,” he all but purrs, his hands resting on your hips as he pulls your hips back against his own.

“That’s because I used one of _my_ donor bags.” You turn to press a kiss to his cheek as he rests his chin on your shoulder, watching you mix the drinks. His arms wrap around you, holding you securely to him as you pull down the Worcestershire sauce from the cabinet above you.

“You spoil me, sweets.” He presses his lips to your neck, followed by a very light brushing of his fangs against the skin which causes you to shiver. “But I prefer it from the source.” You bite your lip as he brushes them a little harder, your hands gripping the counter top to the point your knuckles turn white.

“N-Not too m-much, Max,” you whimper, pressing back against him. You want to pamper him, stroke his hair in the way he likes while he sips on his favorite drink and rests in your lap. You want to make him feel better about himself after the…less than stellar reactions of the night, and you couldn’t do that if you were loopy from blood loss. You gasp, knees giving out as his fangs sink into your skin, his vice-like grip around your waist the only thing keeping you from hitting the ground. He groans as he retracts his fangs, sucking at your pulse point with abandon. “M-Max,” you moan, your hand reaching up to grab his wrist. “E-Enough.” Your word is barely a breath, but he hears you, pulling his lips from your neck before swiping his tongue over the puncture wounds. He grabs a towel, gently pressing it to the now tender skin before licking his lips and pressing a kiss to your cheek.

“You always taste so fucking sweet, baby.” You flash a smile at his praise, turning in his arms to lean against the counter. His face is no longer morphed, the one he wears for his day to day firmly in place again. You wipe a dribble of your blood from the corner of his mouth, holding your thumb up to his lips for him to lick off. He does, savoring your taste before pressing his forehead to yours. “Those brats put me in a foul mood, sweets.”

You sigh, reaching behind you to grab his mug before handing it to him. “I know, darling. It’s why I made you this. I know just how you like your favorite drink.” He grins as he takes it from you, pressing a quick kiss to your lips before standing straight and sipping from the mug, humming with approval. “Come on, let’s go upstairs, I want to pamper you tonight.” He grins, picking you up in one arm as he perches you on his hip to carry you upstairs. You had to admit, the vampire strength was a pretty decent bonus to this whole relationship.

“Gonna spoil me, sweets? What you got planned for your big bad vampire.” He grins at you, pecking your lips again as he sets you down on the bed, taking off his shoes before climbing in with his drink in one hand. You shimmy up next to him, reaching out to gingerly pull him down so he’s resting in your lap, grinning up at you with that playful smirk as your hands begin to roam through his hair. “You know, this is a _great_ view of your tits.” You roll your eyes as he chuckles, grinning back down at him.

“Glad you’re enjoying it, baby. I know boobs help boost your mood too.” He hums, sucking out of the straw in his mug as he gazes up at you, the light in his eyes contemplative. “Your mind is moving a mile a minute. What’s up?”

“Is my vamp face that bad?” he asks, that self-confidence wavering just a bit and your brow furrows. You frown, your hand stilling in his hair.

“No, I don’t think it is, Max. I honestly think it’s scary, but I also know that it’s real… The kids don’t know that, and a lot of them are desensitized to jump scares these days.”

“So trying to scare the kids is pointless, then. Great.” He rolls his eyes, pouting like a child and it takes everything you have in you to not laugh.

“No, Max, I don’t think it’s pointless. I just think that next year, we need to do more than have you hiding in the bushes and jumping out saying ‘roar.’” 

He huffs, taking another drink. “ _I_ thought it was convincing. Damn kids. I don’t get why you like them.” You smile, leaning down to kiss his forehead gently, watching the frown lines relax when you do as your hand begins its gentle ministrations again.

“We’ll get you scaring kids yet, Max, I promise. My big, scary vampire boyfriend. We’re already known as the best candy house. Next year, let’s make us the scariest also.” Max takes in your words, his lips slowly quirking back up at the idea. “I’ll even join in on the scaring!”

His eyebrows shoot up and he slowly sits up, a questioning gleam in his eyes. “And how exactly would you do that? That pretty face of yours isn’t exactly scary, sweets. It’s hard for a pretty girl to be so scary.”

“Say that again when I chase you around with the garlic powder, Phillips.”

He chuckles, resting his forehead against yours. “Okay, fair, I deserved that. But in all seriousness, how do you plan to scare the kids? A scary witch? A psychotic clown with a bloody knife?” He gasps. “A teacher with a pop quiz!” You smack his chest as he giggles like a school kid before giving him a cautious smile. 

“Well… I was thinking that maybe… We could both be vampires…?” You look into his eyes, his now wide as he stares back at you, hoping beyond hope that you mean what he thinks you mean. He leans back away from you, watching your face with such intensity.

“Do you mean… like…” He gestures vaguely to himself and you nod, biting your lip.

“Sometime in the coming year… I want you to turn me, Max. I want us to spend every Halloween together. And every other holiday. I want… I want to be yours for eternity.” Your hands have found his, and you squeeze them gently as he sits there frozen. You’re worried for a moment that you’ve overstepped when he leans in, crashing his lips against yours in a fervent kiss that takes your breath away.

When he pulls back, his eyes are shining and the biggest grin you have ever seen is on his face. “Sweets, I’ve been waiting for you to ask me that for so long. I feel like you just asked me to marry you! I mean, I guess you kinda did, in a different sorta way, but still!” You giggle, loving his excitement as the irritation over the kids from earlier completely vanishes. “We’ll make it special, real special. I’ll plan it all out. It’ll be absolutely perfect.” He leans over you, setting his mug on the nightstand before laying back down, pulling you down against his chest. “Together forever, you and me. The Vampire and his Hot Vampire Wife.”

“How do you think I’d look as the bride of Dracula?” you ponder, already planning next year as you lay there satisfied and thrilled in your lover’s arms.

“Fucking hot, babe. Fucking hot.”


End file.
